Saturday, April 30, 2011

Who am I doing this for, anyway?

Why am I doing this race? Partially for me. Straight-up. That's clear. I'm excited about the challenge.

But ever since I started planning, I've wanted to tie these efforts to something bigger. To raise awareness, and maybe even money, for a cause. I still haven't settled on one. There are so many!

Here are the ones I'm thinking about right now. What do you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts on which one excite you too.

1. Eliminating leprosy. Once you've been to India, you never forget it.
2. Midwife training in developing nations. Lowers mortality rates amongst mothers and babies.
3. Kiva.org. Any money raised keeps on giving through micro-loans that get repaid.
4. Seeyourimpact.org lets you directly help individuals in need all over the world. You get a letter and picture of the person you help.
5. Women's rights/literacy. From acid bath assaults to bombing girls' schools, this matters for humanity's progress.
6. Hieffer International. Give a family some animals they can raise for sustainable food and breeding. It spreads and helps the community.
7. Habitat International (Habitat for Humanity in other countries).

The non-profits I mention are personal favorites.  I could be tempted to do something specific, like to raise money to build houses in Haiti for example. Or to build a well in a village that needs fresh water. Or send a midwife somewhere to train 20 midwives. I dunno. There are so many things I'd like to help with. Where should I start?

I'd love to hear some of your thoughts on this. Which cause do you think would draw the greatest attention and support from the general public? Do you have any leads for me?

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Who is in your inner circle?

Something I've been learning living here in Boulder is that I shouldn't compare myself to others.

There is always someone more fit, more lean, more accomplished, more hard-core. It continues: more health-conscious, more natural with their eating and lifestyle, more educated, and heck, just plain smarter. I have a simple undergrad degree. Boulder has the highest number of PhDs per capita in the nation. Lots of well-read, well-studied folks. Lots of brave adventurers, courageous entrepreneurs and high-powered, effective activists.

I have always walked into a room feeling like the kid, the youngster in a crowd of accomplished, wiser people. Even when that means selling myself short. Comparing myself to those who have achieved much is usually the quickest way to downgrade what I *have* done with my trips around the sun.

Of course, the opposite is true too. I can easily take a look at national averages and feel pretty good about my standing. This breeds complacency. It can even lead to arrogance.

How can we avoid those odious comparisons while still finding inspiration and support from the efforts of others? Most people have a default imaginary circle of people who they feel are watching and judging them as they move through life. Sometimes parents, friends, teachers. Often there are negative judgments and defensive justifications involved. I read about this theory and can't remember the book, or I'd give credit for the idea. Anyway, I decided to be pro-active, and formed a group of carefully chosen people to be my inner circle who would serve as positive mentors.

So who is in my inner circle of peers? Who do I have my imaginary conversations with (Come on! You ALL do it!)? I've chosen some interesting folks, most of whom I've never met directly. I've heard stories about their lives, their works, or I've read their works. Most of them are from previous generations. Most are not famous. Hard working and creative ranchers, farmers, entrepreneurs and homesteading housewives. Philosophers, writers and deep thinkers. A hermit or two. Some spiritual leaders. People with grit, who accept that hard work is requisite for success and hold positive attitudes.

I'm inspired by their ingenuity, humor, gentle joy, persistence, pragmatism, honor, shrewdness, and a toughness that's almost been bred out of my generation. Or schooled out of us. Or... I don't know. We, as a culture, are just not as ass-kicking, snake-stomping, rock-hauling tough anymore. Yet we could be. We complain and make excuses more. These folks step up and get things done without all the fanfare. We admire it when we encounter it. It still exists, like a startling, delightful sighting of an endangered species. And we can consciously choose to restore these values. *(I'm not saying plenty of you out there don't work really hard. I just think we as a culture spend too much time watching TV, surfing the Net, etc etc and I notice I waste bits of time doing useless things in the name of 'unwinding' when there are productive things that can allow me to unwind, too)

So during the day, some of these fair folk lean over my shoulder when I start to zone out reading the comics or some silly digest of crap online and snap me out of it. "What can you be doing that is productive towards one of your goals, young lady?" It's not nagging or judgmental. It's friendly standard-setting. I respect and appreciate the chance to improve my lot in life, and hell, that's going to require hard work! It's not like I'm going change overnight. But I am changing.

At the end of the day, as I head to bed, I review my day with my inner circle. Good day, or wasted? Was there time I could have spent better? It's a nice way to review things. I find I take more and more joy in hard work done well, and not wasting time.

More often than not, when people ask me how I'm doing, I find it harder to complain, because the efforts I'm making leave me feeling satisfied, even if I'm tired. I'm content with working hard, and I have some great cheerleaders. If you haven't cultivated such a group, you should pick some too.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Moving forward

A woman I met in the skate ski clinic this winter was a NOLS instructor in the Northwest before moving out here, and brought her kayak out. She is generously -and trustingly- letting me use it! And it gets to live with me, which makes it much easier. That means I can go to the Arvada Reservoir, which is MUCH cheaper at $15 for the summer pass. Boulder Res costs hundreds. :(

I'm a little nervous about using her boat- it's MUCH nicer than my beater whitewater I got last summer. It's lighter and I suspect more fragile. *Gulp* I have to be careful. On the plus side, being lighter, I can heave all 17 feet of it onto my Subaru without help, strap it down, and remove it without anybody's help.

This Tuesday morning, I'll be taking the kids on a field trip to the fair city of Arvada to buy my summer pass for the reservoir, and I'll bribe them with time at the Arvada swimming pool not far away.

I hope to start off paddling two mornings a week, and work up to four mornings by mid-July, when the grandparents return from their trip and can take the kids one morning a week again.  I don't want to burden my husband with too many breakfasts without me so that he sours on this whole thing. So that fourth morning will be when the grandparents can take the kids.

Other than that, I'm trying to up my tai chi practice by a few hours a week, and I'm trying to bike the kids everywhere I can. I've also upped my general activity levels/lifestyle by creating a mini farm here at home, where there's plenty of hard labor to do building new vegetable garden beds, a chicken coop, bunny barns, landscaping... so I'm good and sore on a daily basis. (We're building it all ourselves from recycled materials we find at Resource here in Boulder)

I figure it's all a good way to toughen up physically and also mentally. I think a fair bit of stamina stems from our expectations of ourselves, and from reasonably working up to greater and greater amounts of productivity. There's a balance to be found between expectations (and desire) and the patience to sustainably push a little further. This kind of conditioning takes time- to build physical strength and endurance, and also the mental attitude and habits.  That's my theory, and I'm testing it out on myself. ;) A year into it, I see lots of progress in both realms.

Hopefully by mid-summer, I'll be training full-on, and still have the energy to plan and cook the family meals, do all the farm chores (weeding, watering, feeding the rabbits and chickens, cleaning their various homes, harvesting, canning, etc), and still be a happy, engaged wife and mother. Are my expectations too high? We'll find out!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Springtime!

The weather is warming up more these days, and I have to find a routine to keep my cardio fitness up in the place of skate skiing now that the season ended this weekend. Here are the ideas I'm bouncing around right now, and need to shore up this week and this month:

1. I got a free rowing machine off of Freecycle that I'm sticking in the basement. I'm giving it a month to see if I am able to get myself to use it. If not, I post it back on Freecycle for someones else to decorate with.

2. I found someone who might lend me her 17' sea kayak to train in for this season. I have to check in with her. It's been hard to find water I can use at 6 am, but I found that the Arvada Reservoir is open at 6:30 am and is agreeable to my plan... Boulder Reservoir is not open that early until the end of May. That's more than 6 weeks out. Too long! I'll get solid answers this week and make my plans.

3. It's bike time! The cars need to be put away for the summer now, and I am back to biking the kids around for our errands and commuting. That's about 40 miles a week pulling 100 lbs of children and gear.

4. Tai chi and chi gung: I'm still doing tai chi, and we've been learning some chi gung that is pretty subtle and leaves me very sore. Great thing to do in the mornings when not paddling or if I wuss out on the rowing machine.

New challenges: My in-laws are going to be gone for the next three months. My husband is working without pay trying to get his business going. So we have no income coming in, little savings, and now no help with the kids for a while. I will have precious little free time to myself, and no extra money to throw at work-out options. I have to be creative. Early morning workouts are key, and "free" is the word of choice!

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Winter hibernaton over- progress report

Last fall I found myself unable to update my blog, and sadly, have neglected it until now.

Why? Because I became very busy working towards my goals, and had to sacrifice something, which ended up being my quiet time at night. So, Yay, a good reason!


What was I doing? Skate skiing (a form of nordic cross country that's really freakin' hard)! Of course, we tried dragging the kids along. Then we bribed the grandparents to tag along to appease the kids, which only sort of worked. We weren't really getting to work out.

Our solution was to get up at 4:30/5am twice a week to ski before my husband's work began. One of us would stay home with the kids and 'sleep in' while the other dragged their backside up to Eldora, 40 minutes away, and stumbled out into the dark to fumble with skis and poles as hands went numb, and then glide off trustingly as the sky slowly lightened up enough to see the snow. I went up Mondays and Thursdays, my husband went Tuesdays and Fridays.

It was heaven. I know I have truly 'arrived' as a hard-core enthusiast when, in Boulder-Land-of-Athletes, there are only a handful of us doing this regularly. Why was this so fun? Certainly, the strain on my heart (literally!) of going up to 9000' in elevation to flail around on super-skinny skis uphill most of the way (Eldora is infamous for its steep trails: the saying goes, "There's no such thing as a casual day in Eldora"), the very cold wind that frequently blew, and the mildly creepy sense of wandering around in the near-dark alone were not the highlights. But here were the snapshots that kept me coming back: the sunrises; the quiet snow and trees; the sudden powerful views of snow-capped peaks; the gentle snowfall that muffled the world; birdsong as spring approaches; learning to recognize animal tracks in the snow; first tracks on freshly groomed trails... ahhhhhh, I'm so spoiled by that one thing that I can't even be bothered to go during normal business hours anymore!


Did I mention that this sport is insanely unnatural and hard? I also asked for my Christmas present from everybody to be that of pitching in towards a women's ski clinic that was once a week, all day, for 6 weeks. So I was really skiing three days a week through February. And it was soooo necessary. I couldn't go more than 50 yards without stopping to pant uncontrolledly, and certainly couldn't make it up a gentle hill without falling or totally losing form. The clinic gave me the tools to start putting the puzzle of skate-ski balance and coordination into place.

Now, last week, I think I went about 7 miles, watching the sunrise, and found myself making it much further between rests. I can go on blues and blacks, not just greens, and have a good time. My cardio is MUCH improved, and my clothes are fitting better. My legs are stronger, and I was able to keep with it through some minor injuries. A knee strain and back strain (both from gardening/construction projects at home) both were unable to keep me from going up for my commune with the snow. Even that demon-nemesis of mine, Sleep Deprivation, tried to stop me and failed. I recall one Wednesday ski clinic where I loaded up on coffee (which I never drink), sudafed for the cold I had, and ibuprofen for the knee pain and skied the whole day with my group. Another Wednesday, the temperature when I got there was -23 when we headed out to ski. We rocked it, though.

I discovered a whole new level of tough. I learned that being cold was okay. Frostbite is not, of course, but there are many levels of functional cold before that. I learned that to be an athlete means working with and through injury, not letting it stop you. Being sick doesn't mean you can't work out, either. Being sleep deprived is the same, as long as you can drive safely.  A certain degree of discomfort comes with the territory of working hard for something. And learning to not let it bother you is huge. Realistically, I have to expect that during the Ultimate Florida Challenge, for 30 days, I will experience all of these types of discomfort at some point. It just can't be a big deal. And the more athletes I meet, the more I understand that for many of them, it isn't that they're genetically primed to never get hurt or sick (although there are a few people like that out there). It's that they have conditioned themselves to work through it. They've toughened up. And so have I, although I'm still a total newbie. I have a stronger mental approach to physically demanding work.

I'm back now, and plan on updating my blog with regularity again. Thanks for letting the blog hibernate, but now it's spring, and I'm ready to add more to my plate again.